Momentos Bro Code VI

(...más)

76) If a Bro is on the phone with a chick while in front of his Bros and, for whatever reason, desires to say "I love you" he shall first excuse himself from the room or employ a subsonic barry white-esque tone.

77) Bros don't cuddle.

78) A Bro shall never rack jack his wingman. Rack jack is to steal your wingman’s chick. To commemorate and solidify the unbreakable bond between the Bro and his wingman, it is recommended that before going out, each face the other, place his left hand on the Bro code, raise his right hand, and recite the wingman pledge.

79) At a wedding, Bros shall reluctantly trudge out for the garter toss and feign interest for the benefit of the chicks present. Whichever Bro gets stuck with the garter shall light-heartedly pretend he's not mortified at the thought of being the next one to drop before scurrying to the bar for a very stiff drink and/or shots.

80) A bro shall make every effort to aid another Bro in riding the tricycle (engaging in a threesome), short of completing the tricycle himself. The total age of all the three should be less than 83.

81) A Bro leaves the toilet seat up for his Bros.

82) If two Bros get into a heated argument over something and one says something out of line, the other shall not expect him to take it back or apologize to make amends. That's inhuman.

83) A Bro shall, at all costs, honor the Platinum Rule: Never, ever, ever, ever " love" thy neighbor. In particular, a Bro shall never mix it up romantically with a co-worker. Exceptions – Coworker is an 8 or better, you are superior to the coworker, coworker dresses a little slutty, company recently sued for sexual harassment, someone makes a bet that you can’t, you are switching floors soon, you and coworker get stuck in elevator, coworker soon to be fired, coworker hits on you, coworker going through divorce, coworker not offended when you accidently email provocative self pictures to office.

84) Bro shall stop whatever he's doing and watch Die Hard if it's on TV. Corollary – Also the Shawshank Redemption, Top Gun, first half of Full Metal Jacket.

85) If a Bro buys a new car, he is required to pop the hood when showing it off to his Bros. Corollary – His Bros are required to whistle, even if they don’t know what they are whistling at.

86) When a Bro meets a chick he shall endeavor to find out where she fits on the Hot/Crazy Scale before pursuing her.

87) A Bro never questions another Bro's stated golf score, maximum bench press, or height. He can however, ask the Bro to prove it, traditionally in the form of a wager.

88) If a Bro, for whatever reason must drive another Bro's car, he shall not adjust the preprogrammed radio stations, the mirrors, or the seat position, even if this last requirement results in the Bro trying to drive the vehicle as a giant praying mantis would89) A Bro shall always say yes in support of a Bro.

90) A Bro shows up at another Bro's party with at least one more unit of alcohol than he plans to drink. So if a Bro plans on chugging a six pack, he shall bring a six pack plus at least one can of beer. If the party sucks and/or there are too many dudes, the Bro is entitled to leave with his alcohol, though etiquette dictates he should wait until nobody is looking.

Momentos cinemáticos II

Hoy voy a seguir con más juegos de temática fantástico-medieval. Los tres videos son tambien de juegos que tratan un mismo universo: Warhammer.

Espero que disfrutéis de las cinemáticas, porque buscarlas en YouTube con una buena resolución para que hagan más o menos justicia de ellas me ha llevado un tiempecillo. A mi estas dos me gustan mucho.

(no olvideis usar el HQ)

(...más)

Momentos Bro Code V

(...más)

61) If a Bro for whatever reason becomes aware of another Bro's anniversary with a chick, he shall endeavor to make that information available to his Bro, regardless of whether he thinks his Bro already knows.

62) In the event that two Bros lock on to the same target, the Bro who calls dibs first has dibs. If both call dibs at the same time, the Bro who counts aloud to ten the fastest has dibs. If both arrive at the number ten at the same time, the Bro who bought the last round of drinks has dibs. If they haven't purchased drinks yet, the taller of the two Bros has dibs. If they're the same height, the Bro with the longer dry spell has dibs. Should the dry spells be of equal length, a game of discreet Broshambo* shall determine dibs, provided the chick is still there. *Rock, paper, scissors for Bros.

63) A Bro will make any and all efforts to provide his Bro with protection. Bro-tection forms a central pillar or, more accurately, a plastic coating for the central pillar of the Bro way of life.

While not legally or physically responsible for any repercussions of failing to provide protection, it’s not uncommon for a Bro to experience pangs of guilt after a fellow Bro becomes infected with a disease. Some of which, such as children, can last an entire lifetime.

64) A Bro must provide his Bro with a ticket to an event if said event involves the second Bro's favorite sports team in a playoff scenario.

65) A Bro must always reciprocate a round of drinks among Bros. Exception - A Bro is off the hook if a Bro orders a drink with an umbrella in it.

66) If a Bro suffers pain due to the permanent dissolution of a relationship with a lady friend, a Bro shall offer nothing more than a 'that sucks, man' and copious quantities of beer. A Bro will also refrain from pejorative commentary - deserved or not - regarding said lady friend for a period of three months, when the requisite BACKSLIDE WINDOW has closed.

67) Should a Bro pick up a guitar at a party and commence playing, another Bro shall point out that he is a tool.

68) If a Bro be on hot streak, another Bro will do everything possible to ensure its longevity, even if that includes jeopardizing his own records, the missing of work, or, if necessary, generating a realistic fear that the end of the world is imminent. Exception - Dry spell trumps hot streak.

69) Duh.

70) A Bro will drive another Bro to the airport or pick him up, but never both for the same trip. He is not expected to be on time, help with luggage, or inquire about his Bro's trip or general well-being.

71) As a courtesy to Bros the world over, a Bro never brings more than two other Bros to a party. Three Bros are cool - Three amigos, Three musketeers, The police, Apollo 13 Astronauts and the Three stooges. Four Bros are lame – Mount Rushmore, The Fantastic Four, The Monkeys and Michael Jordan’s team mates.

72) A Bro never spell-checks.

73) When a group of Bros are in a restaurant, each shall engage in the time-honored ritual of jockeying to pay the bill, regardless of affordability. When the group ultimately decides to divide the check, each Bro shall act upset rather that enormously relieved.

74) At a red light, a Bro inches as close as possible to the rear bumper of the car in front of him, and then immediately honks his horn when the light turns green. That way if another Bro is several cars behind, he'll have a better chance of making it through the intersection before the light turns red again.

75) A Bro automatically enhances another Bro's job description when introducing him to a chick. Chicks like to stretch the truth about their age, promiscuity and sometimes, with the help of extensive make-up and structural lingerie, even their body shape. As such, it is a fair game for Bros to exaggerate reality when asked about their Bro-fession.

Momentos cinemáticos I

Hace ya tiempo que se me ocurrio repescar por youtube y para el blog algunas cinemáticas de juegos de ordenador nada más por el hecho de disfrutarlas, pues algunas son realmente buenas.

Hoy os pondré algunas de temática fantastica-medieval. Otros días seguire poniendo para que no resulten pesadas de ver... aunque visuelamente a mi me gustan y distraen.
(no olvideis usar el HQ)

(...más)

Bueno, hoy pondré 3 sobre el juego World of Warcraft y sus expansiones. Por lo tanto, tener en cuenta que alguna tiene ya casi 5 años.
La verdad es que Blizzard crea una cinemáticas espectaculares.

Momentos Bro Code IV

(...más)

46) If a Bro is seated next to some dude who's stuck in the middle seat on an airplane, he shall yield him all of their shared armrest, unless the dude has (a) taken his shoes off, (b) is snoring, (c) makes the Bro get up more than once to use the lavatory, or (d) purchased headphones after they announced the in-flight movie is 27 Dresses. See Article 35.

47) A Bro never wears pink. Not even in Europe.

48) A Bro never publicly reveals how many chicks he's banged. Corollary – A bro also never reveals how many chicks another Bro has banged.

49) When asked, "Do you need some help?" a Bro shall automatically respond, "I got it," whether or not he's actually got it. Exceptions – Carrying an expensive TV, parallel parking an expensive car and loading an expensive TV on to an expensive car.

50) If a Bro should accidentally strike another Bro's undercarriage with his arm while walking, both Bros silently agree to continue on as if it never happened.

51) A Bro checks out another Bro's blind date and reports back with a thumbs-up or thumbs-down.

52) A Bro is not required to remember another Bros birthday, though a phone call every not and again probably wouldn't kill him.

53) Even in a drought, a Bro flushes twice.

54) A Bro is required to go out with his Bros on St. Paddy's Day and other official Bro holidays, including Halloween, New Year's Eve, and Desperation Day (February 13th)

55) Even in an emergency that requires a tourniquet, a Bro never borrows from or lends clothes to another Bro.

56) A Bro is required to alert another Bro if the Bro/chick Ration at a party falls below 1:1. However, to avoid Bro-flation, a Bro is only allowed to alert one Bro. Further, a Bro may not speculate on the anticipated Bro/Chick Ratio of a party or venue without first disclosing the present-time observed ratio.

57) A Bro never reveals the score of a sporting event to another Bro unless that Bro has thrice confirmed he wants to hear it.

58) A Bro doesn't grow a moustache. Exception – While shaving it’s more than ok for a Bro to keep the whiskers around his mouth till the end so that he might temporarily experiment with different facial hair configurations.

59) A Bro must always post bail for another Bro, unless it's out of state or, like, crazy expensive (Crazy expensive bail >(years you've been bros) x $100)

60) A Bro shall honor they father and mother, for they were once Bro and chick. However, a Bro never thinks of them in that capacity.

Momentos cafeteros

Vamos a hablar de cafés según su preparación. Cierto es que en España no tenemos o deberíamos tener ningún problema a la hora de pedir un café, aunque no siempre es así. En Málaga, es cierto que puedes pedir un café con leche y te sirven un café con leche... bien por ellos!. También puedes pedir un solo, uno con poca leche, uno con mas café y menos leche... y te lo sirven igualmente. Pero tú no veras a un malagueñ@ pidiendo esas cosas. (...más)

El malagueñ@ se toma un sombra, un mitad, un largo... y es que en Málaga, según la cantidad de café que quieras, tiene un nombre u otro. De donde viene esta tradición no lo sé, pero para todos los turistas y los que desconozcan estos nombres podrá encontrar en muchas cafeterías de Málaga y de la costa malagueña muchos servilleteros donde podemos ver en un lateral los nombres de los cafés.


Y no sólo es una curiosidad, también recomiendo que la tengáis en cuenta si vais por Málaga o sus costas, porque de esta forma seguro que acertareis con la cantidad de café que os gusta.

Pero si viajáis al extranjero, quitando los Starbucks donde todos los nombres son iguales en cualquier país del mundo, lo más internacional es el café latte, el cappuccino, el americano, cafe mocha... y para que conozcais bien como es cada uno os dejo una imagen ilustrativa.


Cappuccino, Espresso, nube con leche, solo, con hielo, aguachirri, americano... da igual como os guste el café, pero disfrutar de esta gran bebida que no sólo esta muy buena, además es buena para la salud (en cantidades razonables, como todo en esta vida).

Momentos nóbeles

Hoy voy a hablaros de los premios Nobel... pero de los premios Ig Nobel. No los premios que se entregan en Suecia y cuyo relevancia es por todos conocida. Me refiero a los Ig Nobel, que son una parodia de los anteriores mencionados.

Los premios Ig Nobel se otorgan cada año por las mismas fechas que los premios Nobel (en Octubre). A simple vista, si miramos la lista de premiados de los últimos años, pueden provocarnos como poco una sonrisa. Pero los premios pretenden celebrar lo inusual, honrar lo imaginativo y estimular el interés de todos por la ciencia, la medicina, y la tecnología.

(...más)

En inglés Ig Nobel se pronuncia igual que ignoble, que significa «innoble», de ahí el nombre.

Os pondré unos galardonados de otros años para que veáis a qué me refiero:

-Física 2008: Los estadounidenses Dorian Raymer y Douglas Smith, por probar que un montón de cuerdas, pelos o cualquier otra cosa acaba enredándose y formar nudos.
-Física 2007: José Peña García , de la Universidad Harvard, y Enrique Cerda Villablanca, de la Universidad de Santiago, en Chile, fueron reconocidos por su estudio sobre cómo se arrugan las sábanas.
-Medicina 2008: El estadounidense Dan Ariely, por demostrar que los placebos caros son más efectivos que los placebos baratos
-Economía 2008: Geoffrey Millar, Joshua Tyber y Brent Jordan por descubrir que las ganancias de una bailarina de striptease dependen de su ciclo menstrual.
-Aviación 2007: se lo llevaron los argentinos Patricia Agostino, Santiago Plano y Diego Golombek, de la Universidad Nacional de Quilmes, por descubrir que los hámsteres se recuperan mejor del desfase horario (jetlag) si previamente toman Viagra.
-Física 2006: Basile Audoly y Sebastien Neukirch de la Universidad de París VI: Pierre et Marie Curie por su estudio acerca de por qué los espaguetis secos tienden a quebrarse en más de dos pedazos.
-Física 2001: A Andre Geim de la Universidad de Nimega( Países Bajos) y Sir Michael Berry de la Universidad de Bristol (Reino Unido), por usar imanes para hacer levitar a una rana y a un luchador de sumo.


...es como el festival del humor xD

Me quedo con ganas de poneros más, porque algunos son muy divertidos, pero hay una media de 8-9 premios por año y empezaron en el 1991, por lo que os pongo un enlace para que podáis ver todos los galardonados desde que se instauraron: pincha aquí.

Aun así, os pongo uno más:
-Física 1993: A Louis Kervran, de Francia, ardiente admirador de la alquimia, por llegar a la conclusión de que e calcio en las cáscaras de los huevos de gallina es creado mediante un proceso de fusión fría...

...toma ya!

Momentos Bro Code III

(...más)

31) When on the prowl, a Bro hits on the hottest chick first because you just never know.

32) A Bro doesn't allow another Bro to get married until he's at least thirty.

33) When in a public restroom, a Bro (1) stares straight ahead when using the urinal; (2) makes the obligatory comment, "What is this, a chicks' restroom?" if there are more than two dudes waiting to pee; and (3) attempts to basketball toss his used paper towel into the trash can like a basketball...rebounding is optional.

34) Bros cannot make eye-contact during a Devil's Three-way.

35) A Bro never rents a chick flick.

36) DD: When questioned in the company of women, a Bro always decries fake breasts.

37) A Bro is under no obligation to open a door for anyone. If women insist on having their own professional basketball league, then they can open their own doors. Honestly they're not that heavy.

38) Even in a fight to the death a Bro never punches another Bro in the groin.

39) When a Bro gets a chicks number, he waits at least ninety-six hours before calling her. The reason is Bro-flation. An unreasonable increase in female expectations about how bros should act. You call a woman the next day, she tells her friends that you called the next day, and soon enough, women everywhere will expect guys to call them the next day. Before you know it, bros the world over will find themselves trapped in relationships and all because you couldn’t wait 96 little hours.

40) Should a Bro become stricken with engagement, his Bros shall stage an intervention and attempt to heal him. This is more commonly known as "a bachelor party."

41) A Bro never cries. Exceptions- Watching Field of Dreams, ET or a sports legend retire (only first time he retires).

42) Upon greeting another Bro, a Bro may engage in a high five, fist bump, or a Bro hug, but never a full embrace.

43) A Bro loves his country, unless that country isn't America.

44) A Bro never applies sunscreen to another Bro. Exceptions – If the Bros are within 7 degrees latitude of the equator.

45) A Bro never wears jeans to a strip club. Reasons – a) Cloth pockets are roomier and elastic allowing for a thicker wad of cash. b) Denim clashes with the club’s leopard, zebra or other safari animal motif. c) One word, two syllables, three hours in the ER – Zipper. d) It’s a performance and deserves respect. e) You don’t feel it as much on your… you know what..

Momentos Stargate

Pues sí... y vuelta la burra al trigo. Ya os hablé con anterioridad de la serie y del universo creado de Stargate. Pues los que vimos y disfrutamos de las películas y de las series estamos de enhorabuena, y es que una nueva serie lleva ya un tiempo en el horno y se estrenará a primeros de Octubre de este año: Stargate Universe.

Según tengo entendido, la trama no será como en las dos series anteriores, donde desde una base de operaciones y a través del Stargate viajan e interaccionan con la zona del universo en la que se encuentran. Esta vez, un nuevo grupo se verá atrapado en una nave perdidos en una zona del universo totalmente desconocida y su principal misión no será otra que intentar volver a su casa.

Bueno, no es BattleStar Galactica, pero a rey muerto, rey puesto.

Momentos curiosos

Resulta que este viernes todos vamos a vivir un momento muy curioso. A las 12:34 p.m. del viernes vamos a vivir... pues eso, que serán las 12:34:56 del 7 del 8 del 9.

Es un poco tontería, pero no deja de ser una curiosidad. Tendríais que esperar 100 años para poder vivirlo de nuevo... cosa que a mi no me importaría.

Lo dicho, es una tontería, pero que no sucede todos los días.

Momentos Half-Life

Debido a que este gran juego vio la luz en el año 1998, un grupo de fans decidió hace un tiempo coger el gran motor (Source) de su segunda parte, del Half-life 2, para realizar un remake del juego original.

Personalmente creo que es una gran idea, porque a veces a uno le apetece jugar a los clásicos... y a veces hacen un poco de daño a la vista. Cierto es que para muchos juegos del siglo pasado su aspecto nos trae recuerdos y son parte de su esencia y encanto pero, para otros, un lavado de cara les viene muy bien. Y creo que este es un caso de esos.

(...más)

Disfrutar del trailer:



Y si queréis saber mas sobre el remake, visitar su web.

Momentos Bro Code II

(...más)

16) A bro should be able to recite anytime the following reigning champions: Super bowl, World series and Play Mate of the year.

17) A bro shall be kind and courteous to his co-workers unless they are beneath him on the pyramid of screaming. America was built on the backs of men and women who were yelled at to work harder and the tradition has been screamed to generation from generation. But you just can’t scream at anybody. You can only scream beneath you.

18) If a bro spearheads a beer run at a party, he is entitled to any excess monies accrued after canvassing the group.

Note: To avoid confrontation it’s a good idea to jettison the receipt before returning to the party.

19) A bro shall not sleep with another bro’s sister. However, a bro shall not get angry if another bro says "Dude, your sister’s hot!!". Corollary, it is probably better for everyone if bros just hide pictures of their sisters when other bros are coming over. When in doubt refer to the check list for bro-proofing your home.

20) A Bro respects his Bros in the military because they've selflessly chosen to defend the nation, but more to the point, because they can kick his ass six ways to Sunday.

21) A Bro never shares observations about another Bro's smoking-hot girlfriend. Even if the Bro with the hot girlfriend attempts to bait the Bro by saying "she's smoking-hot, huh?" a Bro shall remain silent, because in this situation, he's the only one who should be baiting.

22) There is no law that prohibits a woman from being a Bro. Women make excellent bros because they can translate and navigate the confusing and contradictory whims that comprise the chick code (Chick do have the chick code!!).

23) When flipping through TV channels with his Bros, a Bro is not allowed to skip past a program featuring boobs. This includes but is not limited to, exercise shows, women's athletics, and on some occasions surgery programs.

24) When wearing a baseball cap, a Bro may position the brim at either 12 or 6 o'clock. All other angles are reserved for rappers and the handicapped.

25) A Bro doesn't let another Bro get a tattoo, particularly a tattoo of a girls name. The average relationship between a man and a woman lasts 83 days. The relationship between man and his skin lasts a life time and must be nurtured because the skin is the largest and second most important organ a man has.

26) Unless he has children, a Bro shall not wear his cell phone on a belt clip.

27) A Bro never removes his shirt in front of other Bros, unless at a resort pool or the beach. Corollary, a bro with a coat of fur on his back, keeps that thing covered at all times even at resort, pool or beach.

28) A Bro will, in a timely manner, alert his Bro to the existence of a fight between two fellow human beings of the female variety. If an informed bro is unable to witness the fight first hand, a spotter bro is responsible for documenting and relating details of girl fight via pictures, video or, barring any other reasonable method, interpretive dance and/or pantomime.

29) If two Bros decide to catch a movie together, they may not attend a screening that begins after 4:40pm. Also despite the cost savings, they shall not split a tub of popcorn, choosing instead to procure individual bags.

30) A Bro doesn't comparison shop.

Momentos Berto

Ayer me reencontré con un vídeo de Berto en el programa de Buenafuente que en su momento no subí al blog por... mmm... no se... pereza, falta de tiempo, estudiar, holocausto nuclear, sexo salvaje con dos gemelas suecas... no estoy seguro.

Espero que paséis un rato tan divertido como el que pasé yo viéndolo. Los dos vídeos van seguidos. Enjoy!

(remember the HQ)